Jean's 宇宙記錄

What does moon mean to you?
When I was a child, I see moon as a glowing object named moon. Not much special. It has nothing to do with my life.
When father and grandma pass away one after another, I see moon as them watching over me. Moon is given the soul of my dears.
Now I see moon as itself or himself or herself. Moon comes out with a routine, although sometimes I cannot see moon due to poor weather conditions. But when moon is seen, moon is hanging against the dark blue sky, and accompanys me wherever I am heading to. Suddenly, I feel I am accompanied. How can I feel alone just because there is no "same species" around?

有點像在單身酒吧裡找結婚對象。（好有意思的比喻；風馬牛不相及地提一下那天r給的好玩比方—你又不是萬金油，我想把你塗哪裡就塗哪⋯爆笑﹗）
可能有用，但有更好的方法去完成你的目標。
如果你熱愛寫作或創作音樂或寫部落格或任何表演藝術，那就就去做吧﹗用你所有的資源去做，只是不要計劃它是賺錢生活的捷徑。
可以計劃從寫書中謀生的人是那些上一本書賺錢的人。其他的人應該是因為熱情、信任、推薦人、講演、諮詢、做改變、一段時間、連絡或喜悅去做這些事。

No doubt, whenever I said or did something to enlighten or inspire people, I see their shinning eyes and that glitters me in return.

K, as if a 陳欣怡 from "destined to fall in love with you" in real life. I know I cannot relate to her 100%: a busy job but not of her interest, which she doesn't know what it is yet; never say no to colleagues because she hardly social, not much time on her own for she has to take care of her mom after a busy long day.... Speeding, probably is the way she gets rid of the stress and boredom.

a, dont forget me when you watch nice indie movies..... (look yearning :p) my last movie of recent is "los abrazos rotos" by a spanish director, Almodovar. I have been his "fan" after first watching his movie in the spanish course in university. Back then, there were so many cultural shocks, however, i enjoy his sense of humor and the colors in the movies, and of course, the stories.
e, it came to me that the first time i learned "purge" is in our first block studying statistics,"to purge the factors"." What the hell is it?" I thought, isn't statistic about regression and combinations these sort of things? Purge! oh, thanks for doing most of the hard work then :D
a student, in his last year in university, said confidently that he has very good EQ in the class yesterday (additional info, the way he moves make me feel he is kinda gay... but not confirmed yet; he has his own opinions and prospect which i have to say, rare in young people here and i appreciate that :) )  I questioned him that you don't get angry with people, but have you ever been impatient with some? He thought and said "no, i always view it as a mission and getting mad won't make things better! " GEE... I easily got impatient ...that could be my new task to deal with :)   
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和兩個小朋友聊過，知道原來人生的志業、家庭的期待與成家立業的掛心都是舉世皆然的。
當我拿著比例尺完全失焦的地圖在加油站前猶豫時，遇到這對小情侶。因為女生很大方的說，如果我不介意，可以跟著他們的機車探險。獨樂樂不如眾樂樂，有同伴怎麼樣都比一個人自己迷途好，於是我也樂得有嚮導跟在他們後頭。
說小朋友，因為現在他倆才23，剛結束在軍隊裡的服役，正在從事一般以色列年青人役後一年的壯遊，同時也想著大學進修的科目。H，更因為在軍中的職務是教海外回以的國人希伯來文，而延長了她的役期。Y，說的更好的英文，因為曾因父母的職務往美首府華盛頓Dc住遊過一年。是在後來吃飯時間閒聊時，才知道他們倆個是在一個義工服務中相識的。或許世界上首富猶太人佔多數，然而，在烽火漫天的以色列，還是有不少需要幫助的小朋友。我想有這個人生裡的愛好做為基礎，感情一定會走得長久的。的確，很容易可以看到他們內心裡的善良。

在往倉儲量販前進時，我想到和ruby的對話。她說我到的那天她離開，不是故意的。不過，這件事她也是在數週之後才說⋯

I have a glimpse of the beauty of meditation, because of it, I begin feeling every cell of mine is dancing... well, or say feeling they are lazy as the bigger I generally feel.
whatever the slightest emotion the tiny cell has, one learns to appreciate that and that makes me feel so alive....

Almodovar's movie, I don't want to miss any because I like the way he uses colors, the stories he tells, all have its strong message while very exotic... these storeis are not usually seen in a comparatively conservative country. I appreciate the way Almodovar treats bodies: it's just body! so natural, so beautiful.
So I went to los abrazos rotos, without hestitation. After vispassana, I would say I could see things in a new perspective and I can be more the playwrighter than a movie watcher.
I find aspirations from Mateo/Harry, whichever name he chose to be himself. He mentioned the thread of a story: how an abandoned child loves his ruthless father while his business partner, Judy, put her idea on his documentary thought as a sad story. There is always something bigger behind stories. Diego, Judy's son, is another secret. I think first, Diego is a great child that any mom would like to have. In the end of the movie, Judy apoligized to Diego for letting him grow up under her great hatred. She later confessed to Diego that Mateo is his father. So that Mateo is the only one doesn't know the truth, but with two greatest loves. Second, I find Judy's love to Mateo from lovers to life-long friends admirable. When Mateo fell in love with Lena, she must suffer a lot while Diego was not in a good health condition. But she, bore all the secrets that brought her guilt and regret for years, chose to be with Mateo, as a friend, as a business partner. Such kind of attitude requires how liberate mind and attitude!
"Dona Sangre"gave Mateo and Diego an inspriation on a vampire story. It is funny that they think Chinese control almost eveything in their society, such as night life. The analogy that Chinese are like vampires that suck human's blood for their own survival is quite delighting, I would say!  

It has been a month since my first day to an amazing journey, to attend to mind and to be liberated through vipassana.
I keep practicing after the course as I made a great determination on the-11th-day discourse because I have learned a great deal in 10 days and felt the teachers practice what they preach. However, meditation is not as productive as it was in the center. My mind is even wilder even though I can easily make it to sit one hour, but if I cannot control the mind, sitting doesn't mean much. Well, I know it is a process...
Last weekend, a girlfriend asked, "your legs look tanner, is that because you went trekking with shorts?" I am tanner, true. But I wore long pants when go trekking. I said so. But this question made me think "if not because of trekking, then how did I get tanned?" This morning practice, I realized that I usually tucked my pants@ great determination hours. In the afternoons, the sunshine, though not torching, still made people wanna find a shadow....
Lesson learned: the answer may not be found in the question, which might mislead the direction to the cause!

The Poem: Invictus
Out of
the night that covers me,
      Black as the Pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
      For my unconquerable soul.
In the fell clutch of Circumstance
      I have not winced nor
cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of Chance
       My head is
bloody, but unbowed.
Beyond this place of wrath and tears
      Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the
years
      Finds, and shall find me, unafraid.
It matters
not how strait the gate,
      How charged with punishments the
scroll,
I am the master of my fate:
      I am the captain of my
soul.